Somedays my head is just a flood of thoughts and I have a hard time streaming together sentences that make sense, and today is definitely one of those days. I was having a really good relaxing weekend that included friend time, nice weather, shopping, and some new furniture, and then I looked at my phone last night. You know when you get those texts and your heart immediately starts to thud in your chest before you even open it? Yeah it was one of those. It was from my best friend from high school (her mom is a cop in our home town). I could only see the first two words and it was the name of a girl we were never very close with.
When I opened it I found out this girl had just died in a car wreck. This isn't earth shattering news, because like I said we weren't very close to her, but it just makes my heart hurt. We are from a town of less than 10,000 people and something about knowing that so many people around you are hurting so much just kills you. Especially since this particular girl's family shares a fence line with my dad's shop. I also think that people my age in our town have a particularly sensitive response to death because every year we were in high school and two years after someone we went to school with died. The odds of this are astronomical. I don't know how one little valley can hold so much hurt and heartbreak.
When I went to college I was shocked when I realized this wasn't a normal thing. Most kids don't have classmates who died. My mind has a hard time grasping death. It's so unfair, and seems so illogical. They were just here how can they be gone? And then I immediately begin thinking what could of been different so it wouldn't of happened? I think being exposed to so much death before you turn 20 kind of warps your mind... All I know is my heart hurts for my home town, I'm tired of death. I thought the curse had finally been broken only to find out that it came crashing back taking someone who was so vibrant and loved by so many. The worst part of the whole story is that she was less than a mile from her house. Less than a mile from being safe. And if it would of happened 10 seconds later she wouldn't of been on a hill, and she probably wouldn't of died. Death is a cruel thing, that I don't think I will ever understand.
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